"I
too have been touched by the devilish one. A tattoo on the left
shoulder. Oh, but when I saw the face of God, I was changed. I
took the entire arm off." (The OAM
"My
name is Mike. His name is BOB." (The OAM)
"Through
the darkness of future pasts, the magician longs to see. One
chants out between two worlds, 'Fire...walk with me.'" (The
OAM)
"Albert,
where does this attitude of general unpleasantness come from?"
(Cooper and Albert)
"You
were visited by a giant?"
"Any relation to the dwarf?" (Truman and Albert)
"You
were in business with a couple of glue-sniffing squishheads, Leo."
(Ben)
"Morning
Lucy, what's going on?" (Truman and Lucy)
"Good
Lord, Laura." (Doc Hayward)
"I've
got good news. That gum you like is going to come back in style."
(The LMFAP)
"Good
work Andy."
"Yeah...woof." (Cooper and Albert)
"I
plan on writing an epic poem about this gorgeous pie!" (Gordon)
"Well
there's no logic at work here, Andy, let that one go. In the grand
design, women were drawn from a different set of blueprints."
(Cooper and Hawk)
"The
old rustic suckerpunch, huh? A hail of bullets would be nice!"
(Albert and Cooper)
"Hang
loose, haoles!" (Doctor Jacoby)
"It's
the secrets people keep that destroy any chance they have of
happiness." (James Hurley)
"You're
making a joke."
"I like to think of myself as one of the Happy Generations."
(Cooper and Albert)
"Great.
After the square dance maybe we can all take a hayride." (Albert)
"Audrey,
that rightward slant in your handwriting indicates a romantic
nature..." (Cooper and Audrey)
"How's
Annie? How's Annie?" (Cooper)
"Norma,
I'll see you in my dreams." (Bobby and Norma Jennings)
"Sheriff
Truman, to see this kind of investigative genius at work...just a
real treat for me." (Cooper, Albert, Truman)
"You're
quite a girl Norma..." (Mr. Mooney and Norma)
"Diane...it
struck me again earlier this morning..." (Cooper)
"I,
uh, performed the autopsy on Jacques Renault..." (Albert)
"Laura?
Laura?" (Waldo)
"Leo
doesn't talk...he hits." (Shelly Johnson)
"Leo
needs a new pair of shoes." (Leo Johnson)
"Let's
rock!" (The LMFAP)
"Cone...I
like to lick." (Audrey)
"For
your information, I heard you speaking about Laura Palmer. One
day, my log will have something to say about this..." (Log Lady
and Cooper)
"Agent
Cooper, I have a call for you from a Mr. Albert Rosenfield, sounds
like long-distance." (Lucy)
"Look
at us, two men apiece and we don't know what to do with any of the
four of them." (Norma)
"Look,
it's trying to think." (Albert)
"Well,
Fred what's your line?" (Blackie and Big Ed)
"Man
oh man you must have the metabolism of a bumblebee." (Truman)
"Leland
says you're going back to Missoula, Montana!" (Leland/BOB)
"I
can't understand a word that you're saying, you have a thing in
your mouth." (Catherine)
"I
have become deeply moved by the plight of the Tibetan people and
filled with the desire to help them." (Cooper)
"Handy
work of Leo Johnson, currently appearing at Calhoun Memorial
Hospital as Mr. Potatohead." (Albert)
"I
can't believe you were ever my age." (Audrey and Cooper)
"She's
my cousin. But doesn't she look almost exactly like Laura Palmer?"
(LMFAP)
"Each
day brings a new beginning." (Invitation to Love)
"There's
a new girl at One-Eyed Jack's. Freshly scented from the perfume
counter." (Ben)
"New
shoes." (Leo)
"Where
there's no sense, there's no feeling, Andy!" (Andy and Truman)
"Leland's
daughter was murdered and the Norwegians left." (Ben & Jerry)
"In
the heat of the investigative pursuit, the shortest distance
between two points is not necessarily a straight line." (Cooper)
"My
log does not judge." (Log Lady)
"Coop,
I may be wearing a dress but I still pull my panties on one leg at
a time if you know what I mean?" (Denise Bryson)
"The
owls are not what they seem." (The Giant)
"The
owls won't see us in here." (Log Lady)
"To
have his path made clear is the aspiration of every human being in
our beclouded and tempestuous existence." (Maj. Briggs)
"I
gotta warn you, Albert's lacking in some of the social niceties."
(Cooper and Truman)
"You
can have a funeral any ol' time. You dig a hole, you plant a
coffin..." (Albert)
"We've
laid in a gala reception for your fair-haired boys tonight." (Ben)
"This
must be where pies go when they die." (Cooper)
"Eureka!
Dale, I could kiss your pointy little head." (Windom Earle)
"Oh
fellas, one more thing...pray for the health and safety of James
Hurley 'cause if anything happens to him, we're coming for you."
(Cooper)
"Harry,
I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day,
give yourself a present..." (Cooper)
"May
I have your attention please, this is Principal Wolchek..."
(Principal Wolchek)
"The
best damn sandwich I ever ate." (Jerry)
"Laura
had secrets. And around those secrets she built a fortress..."
(Dr. Jacoby)
"Secrets
are dangerous things, Audrey." (Cooper)
"Agent
Cooper, the problems of our entire society are of a sexual
nature." (Dr. Jacoby)
"One
woman can make you fly like an eagle..." (Hawk)
"Harry,
the last thing I want you to worry about while I'm here is some
city slicker I brought into your town relieving himself upstream."
(Cooper)
"You
stupid little slut!" (Leo)
"Cooper,
you remind me today of a small Mexican Chihuahua." (Gordon)
"Sounds
like you've been snackin' on some of the local mushrooms."
(Albert)
"Massive,
massive quantities and a glass of water, sweetheart, my socks are
on fire!" (Gordon)
"Sorry."
(Albert)
"Do
you believe the soul?" (Cooper and Hawk)
"The
wood holds many spirits, doesn't it Margaret?" (Hawk)
"Seņor
Droolcup has, shall we say, a mind that wanders." (Albert)
"Nothing
beats the taste sensation when maple syrup collides with ham."
(Cooper)
"I'm
a terrible person, Agent Cooper. I pretend that I'm not, but I
am..." (Dr. Jacoby)
"Shall
I compare thee to a summer's day..." (Ben & Jerry)
"...time
draws nearer with each ticking tock." (Windom Earle)
"God
I love this music. Isn't it too dreamy?" (Audrey)
"I've
got one man too many in my life, and I'm married to him. Sound
familiar?" (Shelly)
"I
have only been in Twin Peaks a short time, but in that time I have
seen..." (Cooper and Albert)
"Distinctive
wounds found on Laura's neck and shoulder appear to be claw
marks..." (Albert and Truman)
"What
the hell kind of operation are the running out of this two-bit
treehouse, Cooper?" (Albert)
"Two
cups of good hot black coffee." (Cooper)
"Albert,
where does this attitude of general unpleasantness come from..."
(Cooper and Albert)
"Harry,
I really have to urinate. Oh! By the way...coffee at the Great
Northern? Incredible." (Cooper)
"This
is the waiting room. Would you like some coffee?" (LMFAP)
"Where
do they keep his water dish?" (Albert)
"Now
when the mill goes up in smoke, the headline we're after..." (Ben)
"Hey,
what's up Doc? It's Laura Palmer, in case you haven't guessed..."
(Laura)
"I've
got a lot of cutting and pasting to do gentlemen, so please, why
don't you return to your porch rockers and resume whittling."
(Albert)
"If
you give me your soul, I'll let Annie live." (Windom Earle)
"Yeah.
Woof." (Albert)
"Anything
we should be working on?" (Truman and Albert)
"As
he so succinctly put it, 'I'M WORRIED ABOUT COOP!'" (Albert)
"Wow
BOB wow!" (LMFAP)
"What
are you waiting for, Christmas? We've got work to do, dammit..."
(Albert)
